Information Overload

NO MORE TODAY, PLEASE.

I’m on information overload.

I’ve read the books, talked to numerous breast cancer patients, researched on the internet and have now been in the offices of several specialists for more hours than I can count.

I have more appointments than I know how to juggle. When this Lionhearted Kat started to hide behind one great big paw, my caregiver man jumped into the arena. He asked questions, explained details I didn’t grasp, and patiently sat in a cool consult room for hours.

What would I say to a woman not yet diagnosed with breast cancer?

Did you know 15% of breast cancer is not detected in a mammogram, a self-exam is important.

1. Know your breasts well. They are not just something to fill out a blouse, or the “girls” as called by the two on “What Not To Wear.” They truly aren’t given to us to flaunt before a guy or get a husband. This is precious tissue, a gift just like our hearts, lungs, ears, eyes and limbs. We should understand what makes them work and every woman owes it to herself to self-exam.

2. If you detect something different during a self-exam, take care of it immediately. I waited six weeks. I’ve learned that six weeks makes a huge difference. Now I’m faced with Stage II cancer, not a simple lump easily removed.

3. Realize not all breast cancer is the same. Because your friend or your Aunt has breast cancer doesn’t mean you know the outcome if you by chance develop breast cancer. My Aunt had cancer and radical bi-lateral mastectomies. She did not have chemo or radiation. She did have hormone blockers. My cousins wife has cancer, also underwent bi-lateral mastectomies. She had six months of chemo and will have no radiation. Me, well, I have cancer, I’ve had two surgeries and unlike theirs, I’m blessed with having chemo, radiation and hormone blockers. Today I learned I’ll have another surgery after chemo.

4. If you are diagnosed with breast cancer, don’t be mislead into thinking you’ll lose weight. Today Dr. Rozak said there are such good meds to stop the nausea many BC patients gain weight. They sit around not feeling on top of the world and eat.

5. Unfortunately, one in four women will probably end up with breast cancer—70% will be hormone positive, like me. The good news about breast cancer, it is treatable.

Yes, I’m on information overload, but with my caregiver hubby chuckling in the corner making sure I drink my fluids, take my pills and sleep, with my family cheering me on and with the prayer support, I’ll make it through this another adventure—not one I chose, but I do believe even this is designed by the one who created me in the beginning.

Read Psalm 139…..God knew me in my mother’s womb and He still knows where I am today.

Found a photo, but on someone else's computer without my photo manager and stuff, I'm lost. So here's the skinny for tonight. Had a great day. It's late and I'm finally wearing down. Thought maybe by now my friend Sharon might call back. We haven't seen each other in fifty years. She called this evening, while we are talking she's freaking out. "Oh, Kat, you won't believe this. I'm breaking out. Blotches everywhere. It's all over my legs." She checked her tummy. "Even my stomach." Sounded like allergic reaction to me. Assured her I'd find people to start praying. Hope it's nothing serious, but as we talked we were both thinking "Urgent Care" here I come.

For those who sent email, I can see you wrote, but for some reason on this computer, I can't view the messages. Grrr. Oh well, by the weekend and another computer I'll figure it out. (Did I say Roger where are you?)

Jill I see you are trying to put the crit group together on another night, great. My only problem is getting there. Possibly Teresa or Glennette will join, I'll check that out as we go along. Oh, well then there is this thing called "Cancer" that might interuppt my plans, too. I do hope you keep moving forward on your ideas anyway, you have my full support grlfrnd.

Then back to that thing that's interuppting my life. Did I tell you a six-year old gave up his window seat for me? He shrugged his shoulders like no big deal. Bobbed his cute little curly locks and grinned at me. "It's alright, I don't mind," he said. Then later when the flight attendant said, "Mrs. Crawford, you need a wheel chair, right?" That little guy looked at me, his eyes wide and said, "You handicapped?" Cute. You should have seen his mothers shocked reaction. Priceless. Kids are sooooo real.

But back to this thing. I've found myself saying, "Please be careful of my left arm, I've had surgery." That makes people think frozen shoulder, broken arm, or possibly pulled muscles. I realized tonight I avoid the C word. Gotta get wild and wooly with this THING that no longer lives in my body, but has created a hole in my future. Cancer demands respect, you can't avoid it, step around it or pretend it's not real.

Oh and one other reminder, it doesn't matter if cancer has history in your family. I only have one Aunt that had breast cancer. You see, cancer doesn't respect the gene pool. Remember ladies, be good to yourself. Have a mammogram once a year and self exam often. You only have one life, use it to the fullest.
PS: Have you found my other blog A Caregivers Corner? I did post there today for the first time in months. Life is just too full to get everything done I want to do before I'm done here.

It's All About Perspective

There’s an email floating around, been out there for years, about the college student that writes home to her parents. Her dorm burned, she jumped out the window, a boy rescued her and took her home. She ends up pregnant but promises to get married before the baby is born. Then she mentions the young man is good to her although of different race and religion, “But after all Mom and Dad, you raised me to love all people.” She mentions she’s headed to the doctor with an infection she caught from the young man, but not too worry too much. That’s when she says, “Well none of the above is true, but I did flunk history and algebra, I just wanted you to see the problem in perspective.

I’ve read that email more than once over the years. Today I’m being faced with perspective. I’m headed for surgery. Not some rare disease like husband’s battle with Pseudomyxoma Peritonei (PMP). The surgery he went through is lovingly called “The Mother of all Surgeries.” No, my battle comes with cute pink ribbons, hats, and purses. Tons of books have been written and almost every woman is related to or has experienced this cancer.

As common as breast cancer is, it remains the #2 killer of women. (Lung cancer is #1). Still I needed perspective today. I don’t post a lot on the PMP support group, but I still keep in touch and read. One dear Dr. Loggie patient has been battling PMP since 1999. Recently she ended up in the hospital with infection in her pelvic region. Yesterday she emailed me to say the antibiotics got the infection under control, but where the tumor is located has broke out…she is flying from the east coast to see Dr. L again. She mentioned her dread of traveling in this condition.

After reading the email I thought about the many others with rare cancer, the struggles with fear of the unknown—I know my journey is doable. Thank you each one for your support, I need your wisdom, I’m trying to keep my listening ears available and a good perspective on my situation.